PopSyndicate.com

Bfft. In trying to sum up Timur Bekmambetov’s Hollywood directorial debut (he helmed the turbulent Russian blockbusters Night Watch and Day Watch) in one word, I found myself baffled and at a loss. And it was then that I came to the realization that the only term that can suitably describe Universal’s Wanted is “baffling.” And it most assuredly is. It’s a rambunctious, often asinine collage of tireless visual stimuli that includes a ridiculous, yet compelling, tale and scattershot wit that will either have you choking on your popcorn or disengaged by its absurdity. Seeing as how I wasn’t eating popcorn, and I was definitely interested, I rather enjoyed it.

Based on the six-issue comic book series by Mark Millar, Wanted possesses aspects similar to the Wachowskis’ Matrix series, none of which, however, measure up or even come close in quality or profundity. But that’s not to say that there weren’t any awe-inducing scenes in Bekmambetov’s unexpectedly large actioner. There were. Plenty, in fact, including some gravity-defying car stunts and an array of pant-bulging head explosions, each captured in slow motion (of course). But they came clumped within the film’s opening half and disappeared shortly afterward, only to resurface near the end, by which time one’s attention was forced to focus on its other, weaker facets, such as its story.

James McAvoy, fresh off the success of last year’s Oscar-contending Atonement, plays Wesley Gibson, a flaccid, mid-twenties account manager attempting to tolerate his pushy boss, his cheating girlfriend and his lousy best friend (with whom his girlfriend’s cheating). He’s broke and on the verge of an emotional breakdown when he’s thrust between two assassins—a femme fatale named Fox (Angelina Jolie) and a deadly male sniper named Cross (King Kong’s Thomas Kretschmann)—at a local convenient store. After trying to escape, Wesley is man-knapped by the red Dodge Viper-piloting Fox, commencing a car chase as unforgettable as it is implausible (Cross keeps close on the Viper’s tail in a retail van, which I wouldn’t believe could top 70 mph).

Fox drives the two to safety—a “textile factory” operated by Morgan Freeman—where a cluster of assassins that call themselves “The Fraternity” explain to Wesley that he’s the son of Mr. X, an assassin with the rare ability to excrete massive amounts of adrenaline (making it seem as though he can slow time with concentration), who was betrayed and killed by Cross, a disgruntled rogue agent, and that he must eliminate Cross before he dismantles The Fraternity. For the six weeks following, Wesley is trained to endure pain, he learns how to fight with and defend against knives, he’s taught how to handle gunnery by “The Gunsmith” (played by hip-hop idle Common), he shoots the wings off of a fly, “curves” a bullet, is lectured on fate, and, eventually, must meet with it face-to-face.

For all of its stupidity (and, trust me, there’s an ample supply), Wanted delivers the action and violence that so many of today’s moviegoers and release studios seem to lust over. It features a star-crammed cast, led by the up-and-coming McAvoy, a strong candidate for future superstardom, who provides the film with a shimmering (and very funny) performance, a few sexy moments—an unclothed Jolie emerges from a steamy wax bath and shows off her tattooed backside—and an undeniable dose of entertainment, challenging each of this summer’s subsequent releases for most preposterous, mind-numbing, hair-raising thrills. And it might just speed away victorious in that regard.

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