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“Hi. My name is Jordan. And I’m a … ” I bite my lower lip and grimace, but push through the first step of my recovery program. “I’m a crime fiction author.”

Oh sure, some might think this isn’t a big thing to admit. Some may even envy my position, but I’m here to confess that as a crime fiction author, I’m not a well person. Bad men speak to me in my head—and I like it. I visualize a bloody crime scene and all I can think about is, “Does viscera have a ‘C’ in it?” When I say, “I’m cracking open a case” I’m not talking Heineken, people. And making a good impression in my world involves shoe prints or tire tracks. In short, what makes some people squeamish puts me on the fiction happy train.

That’s because crime fiction authors don’t think like normal people. We have a warped sense of reality and of what’s funny. If a man is killed from poisoned chickpeas, this is tragic certainly, but I’m thinking it’s a solid case of hummuscide. And I play deviant games of “what if” scenarios in my head, like what if Tupperware could kill? What if coffee shops dispensed mind-altering lattes or espresso was discovered as the sole source of global warming?

Nothing is sacred, literally. I called my mother one day saying, “Yo Mom, I’m putting my Catholic upbringing to good use. I dumped the body in the church.” I waited for her reaction and only heard a deep sigh, a familiar sound by now.

On the less flippant side of the coin, I also imagine and try to capture what courage it takes to run toward a gun shot instead of racing away like a sane person. I have a lot of respect for the men and women of law enforcement and I hope my debut book No One Heard Her Scream (April 2008) reflects that. This book, along with two others, sold in auction to Avon/HarperCollins. My second and third book were released back to back – No One Left to Tell (May 2008) and No One Lives Forever (June 2008).

As for what’s next, my upcoming “Sweet Justice” series will have the first book released Feb 2009 – Evil Without a Face. An illusive web of imposters on the Internet lures a deluded teen from her Alaskan home and launches a chain reaction collision course with an unlikely tangle of heroes. This is the initial driver to my new thriller series. With an international setting, these thrillers will focus on the lives and loves of three women—a bounty hunter operating outside the law, an ambitious vice cop, and a former international operative with a mysterious past. These women give Lady Justice a whole new reason to wear blinders. And their brand of justice is anything but sweet.

I’m a fan of anti-heroes and complex personalities, so I showcase my characters in varying degrees of redemption. Some deserve sympathy or forgiveness while others may be a total waste of skin. And characters handicapped by their personality flaws intrigue me, where only a fine line separates a good man from his criminal adversaries. And as in life, not everything in my books is black or white. I like my work to reflect the gray in between.

I know by now you’re thinking that I really love what I do. I’m conflicted, I suppose. Weighing the consequences of becoming a crime fiction author has not been easy, but I’m taking my recovery one step at a time. And I’m optimistic that I’ll find the right balance—or be forced to find a whole new set of friends.

www.jordandane.com