01/16/2007
: 25 comments: by Stefan Halley
STOP!!! GO READ THE 2010 EDITION INSTEAD!
Since I did a worst actresses list a while back, it’s only fair that I look at the men littering the cinematic landscape. These guys suck out loud in just about everything they’re in. Sure they’ve been in some great films but odds are they aren’t the reason the film is go good.
10. Jack Black - Ok we get it, you want to be the next John Belushi. We all know you’re fat and you can take a hit as well as the next guy. Now here is a change, try to be funny. There is a difference between being an obnoxious bore and being funny. When an actors top way of showing excitement, anger, surprise or joy is the exact same expression (bugging his eyes out), there is a problem. Just remember, Belushi wasn’t just fat, he was also talented.
Best Movie: High Fidelity
Worst Movie: Nacho Libre, Envy
9. John Heder – Who would have thought that the actor that played Napoleon Dynamite wasn’t acting. Heder tried to move past his debut acting performance but he’s not that good of an actor. Oh well maybe they’ll do Napoleon Dynamite: The College Years and he can ride that gravy train for a few more years. Gosh!
Best Movie: Napoleon Dynamite
Worst Movie: Everything not Napoleon Dynamite
8. Mark Wahlberg – I don’t care what anyone says, he’ll always be Marky Mark to me. Wahlberg surprised everyone when he didn’t suck in Boogie Nights. It wasn’t that he didn’t suck so much as everyone else raised him up a level. Since then, coasted from film to film basically playing the same character over and over again. That’s not to say he doesn’t have range. He’s played everything from a sullen cop to a sullen bad ass. No one has carried one note to the level that Marky Mark has.
Best Movie: The Departed, Boogie Nights
Worst Movie: Four Brothers, The Truth About Charlie
7. Ben Affleck – Ben Affleck can’t decide he wants to be a romantic lead or an action hero, so he split the difference and decided to suck at both. No actor should have two films on his resume where he’s able to turn a lesbian straight. Fortunately he’s slowing down on his filmmaking, which means less suck for the rest of us.
Best Movie: Dogma, The Sum of All Fears
Worst Movie: Surviving Christmas, Gigli, Reindeer Games
6. Dane Cook – How does this guy have a career? His standup isn’t funny. Loud doesn’t equal funny. The only thing unfunnier than his standup are his films. He’s co-starred with such acting legends as Dennis Rodman and Jessica Simpson where he was able to be worse than them. Please someone stop his career before it’s too late.
Best Movie: Waiting…
Worst Movie: Torque, Simon Sez, Mystery Men, Employee of the Month
5. Keanu Reeves – Quite possibly the Godfather of crap acting, Keanu Reeves has managed to craft a very lucrative career based solely on flat performances and the use of the word “Whoa”. Reeves has managed to suck in everything from science fiction to Shakespeare. Bland has an image, that image is Keanu Reeves.
Best Movie: Constantine, The Matrix, Bill & Ted’s Excellent Adventure, Speed
Worst Movie: The Gift, The Watcher, The Lake House, Feeling Minnesota, Dracula, Johnny Mnemonic
4. Jason Statham – Statham plays the bad ass with an attitude perfectly. Unfortunately, he seems to have a problem speaking English which is interesting since he is English. While Jason can vanquish any foe, he’ll never be able to beat his greatest villain, dialogue.
Best Movie: Snatch, Crank
Worst Movie: Ghosts of Mars
3. Ashton Kutcher – If Hollywood has proven anything, you don’t need to be talented to be successful, just good looking. Ashton Kutcher is the proof of that. Showing the depth and range of a coma patient, Kutcher goes from one movie to the next looking as clueless as ever. If he and Jessica Simpson ever starred in a movie together would they have to share the brain?
Best Movie: The Butterfly Effect
Worst Movie: Just Married
2. Josh Hartnett – Is squinting an acting style? If so, no actor has perfected it as well as Josh Hartnett. Constantly looking like he’s either constipated or having a brain freeze, Hartnett’s beady eyes portray a whole range of emotion, well they would if we could see them.
Best Movie: Black Hawk Down
Worst Movie: Wicker Park, Black Dahlia
1. Paul Walker – Bland and blonde, Paul Walker has it all. The poor man’s Ryan Philippe (is that even possible), Walker has been in numerous films and you’ll be hard pressed to remember any of them. Go on…try to remember one. Be honest, if his picture wasn’t here would you even remember what he looked like?
Best Movie: Pleasantville
Worst Movie: Timeline
Location: Malmo, Sweden
Occupation: Editor-in-Chief
Bio: Stefan has been writing reviews for nine years and started Pop Syndicate out of need to voice his mis-guided opinion.
Posts: 449
Posted by JuvDude on 03/18/2008, 09:14 AM
How can you be so harsh in your assessment of Ashton Kutcher? He’s a real hottie and when you are as cute as he is acting talent takes second place. But Aston has acting and other talent. Have you seen him hosting Saturday Night Live in nothiung but his tightie whities? Have you seen him in that iconic classic film “Dude, Where’s My Car?” where he costars with Seann William Scott? Ashton is breathtaking! And there are some great nude shots of him!
Cheers!
Juv Dude
Posted by Ethan on 03/24/2008, 07:05 PM
Ashton Kutcher was not bad in “Butterfly Effect.” As a moron in “That ‘70s Show” he does a great job, but that’s because it’s easy to play a moron when you are a moron. He is the Keanu Reeves of this generation. Keanu was an excellent idiot in “Bill & Ted” but he has primarily sucked in most of his other films. One or two have been decent, but overall, his acting skills, as well as Ashton’s, are so below par that they belong on a miniature golf course.
Posted by Melissa ;) on 06/18/2008, 11:37 AM
Paul Walker has been in movies such as “Shes all that, The fast and the furius ,2 fast 2 furius and now The fast and the furius 4, Running scared, Into the blue, Timeline, 8 below, The death and life of Bobby Z…” Need i say moore? I think you should take him of this list and replace his name with gee i dont know.. maybe with the guy that plays Mike Tyson? ( he sucked)or maybe thats what Mikes really like? I dont know.. (in that case, maybe his a good actor afterall?) Anyways stop trashing Paul Walker ur just jealous cus he can get any girl he wants ha,ha :)
Posted by Stefan Halley on 06/18/2008, 11:46 AM
Wait…are you trying to prove that Paul Walker is a good actor because your argument isn’t very good. All of those movies sucked.
Posted by Melissa ;) on 06/18/2008, 11:54 AM
Who are you to say all those movies sucked? How come the guy is making millions if all his movies sucked? I love all his movies, so i bet you like all the kind of movies that i would hate.. like hairspray and such well goodnight ill have to go to bed now, some of uss got a job to go to nighty night ;)
Posted by Kemphas Holmes on 07/06/2008, 09:04 AM
Nicholas Cage, I cant believe this idiot is not in the top 10. In fairness, it’s probably the writers/producers/casting directors fault for casting the guy but it doesn’t mean he should be overlooked. The guy is suited to playing off-beat weirdo types but seeing him in a lot of recent “blockbuster” type films just beggars belief. The guy is totally one dimensional and unconvincing in big roles, I feel it patronising being subjected to his aweful performances in interesting films. Please Hollywood, stop casting this waste of celuloid.
Posted by JuvDude on 07/06/2008, 12:20 PM
I think that Ashton Kutcher is so cute that his cuteness more than makes up for any lack of acting talent.
He has an extraordinary pretty face and a great bod to match.
Did anyone see him hosting Saturday Night Live wearing only his tighty whities? Gorgeous!
Iʻm in love with Ashton Kutcher!
JuvDude
Posted by Ethan Nahté on 07/06/2008, 05:30 PM
Ashton Kutcher? Seriously, I either want some of the meds you’re on. If you’re not on any, you might consider getting some. No amount of cuteness or hotness makes up for a lack of talent. Jennifer Garner is pretty hot, and talented even. But even her looks and body in tight leather couldn’t save “Elektra” from being one of the worst movies ever.
Posted by JuvDude on 07/07/2008, 07:35 AM
Yes, Ashton Kutcher. I am not on any meds, and the only medication I think I need is more of Ashton. Heʻs adorable! I especially like him playing a stoner in the iconic _Dude Whereʻs My Car?_. Thanks to Ashton _Dude Whereʻs My Car?” is becoming a film classic. Ashtonʻs good looks and charm make up for any and all lack of talent. Heʻs a hunk!
Cheers!
JuvDude
Posted by Nick Anno on 07/07/2008, 12:37 PM
There certainly are those old-school greats who have descended below mediocrity (Nicolas Cage is a premier example), and then there are actors in today’s risk-quality-for-money age who have had some truly inspired works, but have since undertaken roles that sacrifice their ability for box office draw. I’m not commending Keanu Reeves, though I believe he falls into this particular category. He was originally a promising indie actor (he’s terrific in Van Sant’s My Own Private Idaho, opposite River Phoenix, and wasn’t bad in ’86’s River’s Edge), then evolved into one of only a handful of Hollywood actors/actresses who understood and adequately delivered Shakespearian literature through a cinematic performance (Branagh’s Much Ado About Nothing is proof). Heck, I even liked him in The Devil’s Advocate. After The Matrix, however, he was typecast as a monotonous or deeply intuitive character that wasn’t required much talent to transpose on screen, which is unfortunate, though his choice. (You’ll get to see his latest humdrum performance in the upcoming remake The Day the Earth Stood Still, in which he plays Klaatu, a role played very well by Michael Rennie in Robert Wise’s classic.) But let’s not forget what he’s accomplished, even recently (his acts in Something’s Gotta Give, A Scanner Darkly, and, especially, The Thumbsucker were great).
Posted by Nick Anno on 07/07/2008, 12:42 PM
P.S. Hayden Christensen and Orlando Bloom unquestionably deserve a place on this list—and a pretty high one, too. Despite a sufficient performance in Shattered Glass, Christensen is, in my opinion, the quintessential deadwood actor—he’d have faired well as an actor in the ’40s, that’s for sure. And Bloom…well, he’s only tolerable in LOTR, in which his character is so weird to begin with that his dreadful acting ability is hardly evident.
Posted by David on 08/30/2008, 09:35 AM
I totally second Hayden Christensen. I think Lucas did a better job casting Jar-Jar.
What about Chuck Norris? Ever catch an episode of Walker Texas Ranger? There are ALOT of horrible action stars, but not only can Chuck not act, it seems like he can hardly even read.
Dont forget David Caruso either. He’s the one that inspired me to search for this list.
Posted by Stanley Kubrick on 09/03/2008, 07:56 PM
No Sly Stallone, Steven Seagal, David Caruso, Arnold Schwarzenegger, Jean-Claude Van Damme, Chuck Norris? And don’t forget the king of bad acting, the man who pioneered acting badly in movies: Bela Lugosi. While he might have been good in White Zombie and Dracula, Lugosi couldn’t do anything else for the rest of his life and had to resort to making crappy Ed Wood movies literally until the time of his death. And speaking of Ed Wood, how about a Worst Directors List?
Posted by Juv Dude on 09/04/2008, 04:27 AM
Hayden Christensen does deserve a place on this list in my opinion. He is a hunk almost the equal of Ashton Kutcher.
Cheers!
JuvDude
Posted by bobo on 11/08/2008, 07:57 PM
Possibly the worst list of bad actors I have seen yet. I agree with Ben Affleck, maybe Paul Walker, of course Keanu, but the rest, really? Black is hilarious, and because his movies are not normally high-brow doesn’t mean he is untalented. Marky Mark and Hartnett are very gifted actors, and Statham is a true action star. This is just a bad list altogether, we don’t expect comedic actors to be the most truly convincing, like Heder. Nor do we expect comedians like Cook to transfer seamlessly into acting. The statement that they would be working as janitors perplexes me considering Statham was an accomplished diver before acting, Black was a successful comedian and musician, Cook (whether we like it or not) was until recently the most successful comedian on the planet. Kutcher may not be the most giften thespian, but we are forever grateful for Kelso, and can’t deny the impact of his endeavors like Punk’d. I haven’t seen your list of female actors, but I can only assume it is as inaccurate.
Posted by JuvDude on 11/09/2008, 05:56 AM
Hayden Christensen and Orlando Bloom are both hotties, in the same category as the
very pulchritudinous Ashton Kutcher. I think that cuteness and good looks more than makes up for lack of acting talent. These hot dudes donʻt need acting talent. They are eye-candy!
Cheers!
JuvDude
Posted by Andrew on 11/14/2008, 05:08 PM
Rob Schneider…. “The Animal” really does set the bar for bad movies.
Posted by lqdgrphcs on 11/18/2008, 04:14 AM
Hayden Christensen…..I have tried to give him the benefit of the doubt. I mean my intro to him was Lucas’s butchering of his own franchise but nothing else I have seen him in has inspired much sympathy.
Now David Caruso…..that man needs to praise the Pop Culture Gods that he is even able to be on TV. Someone needs to take away his sun glasses and bury them somewhere in a deep dark hole, stampede horses over it then salt the land to make sure nothing ever grows there.
Leslie
Posted by Acting School on 08/19/2009, 10:22 PM
I really agree Orlando Bloom should have been on this list in fact aced it but I don’t quite agree with you when you say ashton and keanu are worst actors, may be you need to check out movies like a lot like love for ashton and a walk in clouds or sweet November for keanu.
Posted by michele cresci on 08/21/2009, 03:30 PM
they should put an end to keanu reeves
he is the worst actor ever, since the silent era
Posted by qoweedjede on 11/08/2009, 01:45 AM
In private Keanu admits he’s not an amazing actor…He know’s what he is. I still like his work!
Posted by Brian N on 12/20/2009, 10:03 PM
I think we have a strong case for 2 other actors:
Michael Cera
and
Seth Rogen
Thay always play the same role… Type casted already.
You can probably splice them from any movie and put a scene in another one without changing anything to make it fit.
One is a geek that plays himself all the time
the other one
a looser fat guy with a pot problem with a stupid laugh
Posted by joe omalley on 12/26/2009, 10:41 PM
jack black yes! talent free zone ,only slightly less talented than peter ‘i will take 300 years to do a pan shot” jackson they were such a good fit in king kong.
Posted by DIEMICHAELCERA on 01/06/2010, 11:57 AM
Hands down the worst actor ever is Michael Cera. Anytime a movie trailer of a movie he is in comes on TV, I have to hold myself back from puking. Why he isn’t #1 or #2 on this list escapes me. The fact he isn’t even on this list scares me.
Posted by the guardian on 01/28/2010, 05:12 AM
watch the guardian ashton’s best work at a serious role