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What with the recent cornhole discussion on the show, it occured to me that we throw out some terms or refer to places on the show that only a true Cincinnatian would know or understand. So…that being said, this is the thread to explain those moments.

To start, we have cornhole. I don’t get it either, but if you want to learn more you can go to playcornhole.org to learn all about it. I played today, it being a holiday and such, and it turns out that it does suck…but I’m really good at it.

Moving forward, we have Cincinnati chili. You may have heard us talk about 3-ways and coneys and such. This isn’t innuendo. This is food. And phenomenal food it is. Cincinnati chili isn’t normal chili; it’s watery and often served over spaghetti. I know what you’re thinking, but it really is good. Go to skylinechili.com for more info and to buy some.  And my little avatar-thingy is a picture of a 3-way. Not the hot kind, but the kind with cheese, chili, and spaghetti.

What else? Oh yeah, the Bengals and their constant legal/criminal problems or inappropriate ad campaigns.What can I say…I love those boys no matter what. We also have the Reds, but baseball kinda bores me so I don’t have much to say about this subject. Anyone? Do they suck? It seems they might, but I’m not really paying attention.

We’ve also endured riots, boycotts, Jerry Springer as mayor, etc. We have a beautiful downtown with zilch going on and a polluted river. And Cincinnati features a huge Catholic community, so there’s plenty of drinking, gambling, and festivals in the summer with both.

We’re also really close to Kentucky and Indiana, but I don’t want to go advertising that. Just kidding.

I guess we can just add on to this post as necessary. Or does anyone want to mention something I’ve missed? Or am I total asshole for even bothering with this?

Cornhole! I just played it for the first time at a Memorial Day BBQ this weekend. It turns out I’m a Cornhole master. I guess everyone has a hidden talent.

The Reds have the worst record in the NL right now…  They’re tied with the Royals for the second worst record in all of MLB, and are only 1 game up on baseball’s lovable losers, the Rangers. 

In case anyone cares.

Ah, the Reds. Home of Marge Schott and her delightful views on race and Hitler. She was hell on wheels. But apparently a good tipper. My sister used to work the concession stand at the old Riverfront Stadium and Marge bought food from my sister sometimes and would always tip generously. Anyhoo, our team has talent on the offensive side but we have the worst bullpen in the major leagues to go with the worst record. Here’s to next season!

Cincinnati is also famous for it’s big German population. We have the second biggest Oktoberfest in the world. Chicken Dance anyone? And if anyone gets the chance to try Goetta, please do. It is delish!

We are also the home of Graeter’s Ice cream, which is Oprah’s favorite. And you know it has to be good if big old Oprah likes it. You go girl!

Local restaraunteur Jeff Ruby recently made headlines for not serving O.J. Simpson at one of his establishments during the Kentucky Derby.

Procter & Gamble, one of the biggest corporations in the world, is also based here. They also employ some of the NOTLPers. Eventually everyone works for P&G. You can’t fight it.

One of the areas in the city is, I believe, ranked #3 nationally in donations to the Republican party so you can’t win ‘em all. Ugh!

So come to the ‘Nati and we’ll show you a good time!

“Nati sounds like a gainers paradise!

Yeah, yeah…You know here in we here in Indiana also have some similarities with alls you in the “nati. First of all there is the Skyline Chili. Uck!  There is one right next to my store and I haven’t eaten there in a year. It’s just so…...funky. Okay maybe that’s just one thing we have in common, but yeah I have no idea as to why my fiance wants to take our short honeymoon there…..very odd. Oh yeah….this is my first post and first time as a listener to make my presence known!!! I always wanted to call the voicemail but everytime I do I just hang up. I think I might have a complex. Anywho, hello from you neighbor in Indy! One more thing though, oddly enough I have played Cornhole, and I too also kick ass at that, but so does everyone else i know who plays. They even have a Cornhole Tournament and our Parks at Rec Centers. Lame.

Ah regional idiosyncrasies.

You all think it’s weird in Cincinnati? I’ve lived in New England for about five years and I still can’t figure out what’s going on half the time.

Whenever I find other Midwesterners out here, I cling to them for sanity. Or at least a recipe for seven layer salad. Plus they are not afraid to use a turn signal.

I think the strangest thing about living here is having another state practically within walking distance.  Kentucky has become this sort of ‘soft parent’ that you go to to override the harsh rules of the other.  Booze getting costly?  A 10 minute drive to KY, and it’s suddenly cheaper.  Bars won’t let you smoke anymore?  They will in Covington, and you can be there momentarily.  You really can circumvent any bothersome rule in Cincinnati with a short drive.

Yeah we have to go to Kentucky to see naked strippers. It’s weird here in Indy they have to put little nipple covers on there ta-ta’s and still wear a g-string. So I guess it’s just kinda stripping. Indiana is weird about nekkidness.

NOTLPChiz - 29 May 2007 04:51 AM

I think the strangest thing about living here is having another state practically within walking distance.  Kentucky has become this sort of ‘soft parent’ that you go to to override the harsh rules of the other.  Booze getting costly?  A 10 minute drive to KY, and it’s suddenly cheaper.  Bars won’t let you smoke anymore?  They will in Covington, and you can be there momentarily.  You really can circumvent any bothersome rule in Cincinnati with a short drive.

You call it Kentucky. I call it New Hampshire.

Zombie3X53 - 29 May 2007 05:50 AM

Yeah we have to go to Kentucky to see naked strippers. It’s weird here in Indy they have to put little nipple covers on there ta-ta’s and still wear a g-string. So I guess it’s just kinda stripping. Indiana is weird about nekkidness.

Funny you should mention that, because my friend and I used to make the 1 1/2 hour drive to Indianapolis all the time to go to PT’s, which I still consider the Shangri-La of strip clubs.  The only strip joint in KY I’ve been to is Racer’s, by the Kentucky Speedway, and it was decidedly unpleasant.  There really are some things you can’t unsee…

NOTLPChiz - 30 May 2007 03:57 AM

Zombie3X53 - 29 May 2007 05:50 AM

Yeah we have to go to Kentucky to see naked strippers. It’s weird here in Indy they have to put little nipple covers on there ta-ta’s and still wear a g-string. So I guess it’s just kinda stripping. Indiana is weird about nekkidness.

Funny you should mention that, because my friend and I used to make the 1 1/2 hour drive to Indianapolis all the time to go to PT’s, which I still consider the Shangri-La of strip clubs.

I have to disagree.  Mons Venus in Tampa.  One time a friend who was in a wheelchair went and the girl dancing managed to have her knees on the stage, her hands on his… handlebars, and was just jiggling in front of him.  Worth the cover.

NOTLPChiz - 30 May 2007 03:57 AM

Zombie3X53 - 29 May 2007 05:50 AM

Yeah we have to go to Kentucky to see naked strippers. It’s weird here in Indy they have to put little nipple covers on there ta-ta’s and still wear a g-string. So I guess it’s just kinda stripping. Indiana is weird about nekkidness.

Funny you should mention that, because my friend and I used to make the 1 1/2 hour drive to Indianapolis all the time to go to PT’s, which I still consider the Shangri-La of strip clubs.  The only strip joint in KY I’ve been to is Racer’s, by the Kentucky Speedway, and it was decidedly unpleasant.  There really are some things you can’t unsee…

Hah yeah PT’s is pretty much as good as it gets around here. Most of the other ones around here have creepy women with funny teeth.uck.

alyssa - 29 May 2007 02:30 AM

Whenever I find other Midwesterners out here, I cling to them for sanity. Or at least a recipe for seven layer salad. Plus they are not afraid to use a turn signal.

Sanity!?!  We’ve got a highway named after Ronald Reagan and a street called Pete Rose Way. My opinion? We revere some effed up folks here in the Queen City. Don’t even get me started on the flying pigs.

And turn signals!?!  Even the cops don’t use ‘em here.

Amy NOTLP - 31 May 2007 02:10 PM

alyssa - 29 May 2007 02:30 AM

Whenever I find other Midwesterners out here, I cling to them for sanity. Or at least a recipe for seven layer salad. Plus they are not afraid to use a turn signal.

Sanity!?!  We’ve got a highway named after Ronald Reagan and a street called Pete Rose Way. My opinion? We revere some effed up folks here in the Queen City. Don’t even get me started on the flying pigs.

And turn signals!?!  Even the cops don’t use ‘em here.

Yeah I am afraid to say that here in Indiana we too also revere some wackos. We name a highway after the famouse R&B producer and artist Kenneth “babyface” Edmunds but they refuse to honor 465 in the name of David Letterman, even though the general population was all about that. As for driving, most of the midwesterners i run into can drive around here. Garanted, after the first five minutes of a raindrop, you will hear the police sirens wailing getting to the first moron who freaked out cause its raining. For god’s sake we have the Indy 500 here and nobody can flippin drive. I hate the general population of this state….cept for the cool people. cause there cool. wow it’s late…...

[quote author=“Zombie3X53” date=“1180692614]Garanted, after the first five minutes of a raindrop, you will hear the police sirens wailing getting to the first moron who freaked out cause its raining. For god’s sake we have the Indy 500 here and nobody can flippin drive. I hate the general population of this state….cept for the cool people. cause there cool. wow it’s late…...

I’ve never understood that about this area.  There could be 7 inches of snow on the ground, and people will barrell through it in their SUV’s like it’s a clear spring morning.  The lightest drizzle, and everyone’s driving 20 miles under the speed limit, desperately avoiding the moist grip of the Clear Death.