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Part One in a multi-part series about Dragon*Con in Atlanta from the perspective of a normal guy who, admittedly, turns out to be not so normal…or is he?

Now, I know what you’re thinking.  You’re thinking that outing a virgin at a Sci-Fi, Comics and Role Playing convention isn’t exactly the earth shattering declaration that should really title an article.  But, let me be clear.  I am the virgin.  Let me be even clearer.  I have known the touch of a woman, several women actually, but that is a story for another column if Stefan ever lets me write for the site again, because after this article…I’m not sure he will. 

I am a virgin in terms of convention attendance.  I have never taken part in, walked by, or even been in the same town in which a con was taking place.  And for this, I am ashamed.  So far the folks at Dragon*Con have been the most hospitable, pleasant, and helpful people I have ever had the pleasure of dealing with.  I cannot stress this enough. 

I’d love to say that I went into this assignment with wide eyes and gape-mouthed wonder, but let’s be honest.  I was probably just as bigoted as any other mainstream mediaphile.  I expected to be uncomfortable, I expected to feel out of place, and I expected to have an ill begotten sense of superiority.  In my every day life, I’m the guy with the comic book wisdom.  I’m the guy with more knowledge of movies that my friends and acquaintances deem normal.  The only reason that I feel uncomfortable at all is because I am dealing with people on THEIR turf.  I am the outsider, the one that doesn’t belong.  And yet, I’ve been welcomed here with open arms.  Maybe I’ll learn something this week after all. 

What I’ve discovered in the short time that we’ve been in Atlanta is that everything you know about conventions is wrong.  Sure, the argument could be made that conventions are full of freaks in costume, but really?  Really?  Who the hell am I to judge?  Good on these people for finding something they love and putting time and effort into crafting a persona that makes them feel special.  And thank you for sharing it with me.  And to top it all off, everyone, and I mean EVERYONE that I have met at Dragon*Con, has been completely affable and a joy to converse with.  Maybe that’s because I’m a closet nerd…

(Holy shit…I hope Stefan is ok with me using the word shit, because holy shit!  Malcolm McDowell just walked past me as I was typing this column.  The real deal, bad guy from Generations, Malcolm mother trucking McDowell.  Maybe my nerd isn’t quite as closeted as I’ve led myself to believe.) 

…or maybe, just maybe, it’s because these folks are just like everyone else.  As for the common belief that all people interested in sci-fi and comics are lonely virgins, buddy, let me tell you.  There are more people getting ass at Dragon*Con than every fraternity party being held this week at Iowa State University…combined.  Take THAT Tau Kappa Epsilon…judge the nerds NOW.   

Dwight Schultz, Dirk Benedict, and Slutty Dorothy…Oh My.

How to achieve Nerdvana. Part II of Dragon*Con

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