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Why Lord?  Why they gotta keep making these films?

When a DVD bills itself as “From a producer of Dude, Where’s My Car?”, you know not to expect much.  Directed by Freddy Kreuger himself, Robert Englund, Killer Pad is basically the same movie as Dude, Where’s My Car? except instead two idiots trying to find their car; we get three idiots trying to get laid at their new killer pad.  Comic hijinks do not ensue.

Three friends – Doug (Daniel Franzese), Craig (Eric Jungmann) and Brody (Shane McRae) – move to California after getting a bunch of money from a mishap with their dog, Ballsy.  They get an extremely good deal on a huge house that is fit for a movie star instead of three idiots.  Three are amazed at how nice the house is and how friendly the local women seem to be.  Naturally, out trio plan the ultimate house party. 

They plaster the neighborhood with flyers and get everyone from a nerdy photocopy boy (Andy Milonakis) to Joey Lawrence to a plethora of hot young ladies.  The party is a smash hit and people are coming out of the woodworks to attend.  Of course, when you own a house over a gateway to Hell, people start dying just as fast.
To give the film some credit, director Englund knows he’s making a stupid comedy and doesn’t try to pretend it’s something it’s not.  He knows the film is crass, silly and at times downright moronic.  With that in mind, Killer Pad is still a huge letdown.  The jokes are largely unfunny and predictable.  Most of the best are cribbed from better films and the three leads should strike this from their resume in hopes that no one ever sees it.  Oddly enough, the Joey Lawrence bits were the highlight of the film and the homage to Weekend at Bernie’s was a nice touch.

As for extras, Robert Englund does a decent job trying to defend his choices, but he’s not going to convince anyone.  “The Making of Killer Pad: All-Digital Workflow” shows how the digital effects are done.  It’s a good piece for aspiring filmmakers to watch.  They producers used digital effects to keep costs down and overcome some of the costlier concerns. 

Killer Pad isn’t scary enough to be a horror film, nor funny enough to be a comedy.  Instead, what you get is a bad mix of both resulting in something that pretty much no one beyond a thirteen year old will want to see.

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