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With a 78 minute running time, you might find yourself wishing that the movie was just a little bit longer so you could sit there and continue to take in all of the pretty pretty

If you ask me, robots get a really bad rap in movies.  We always think the worst.  “Oh no, the robots have developed free will!  They’re going to try to kill us now!”  How selfish is that thought process?  What makes us seriously so important that the robots would consider us a threat?  And why would the robots want to stage a violent uprising?  They’re ROBOTS!  They just have to wait and they’ll outlive us all!  Sorry.  That’s just one of the many things that runs through my mind as I consider stories like the one presented in 9. 

It’s either the distant future or an alternate past, I really can’t tell exactly which, and all traces of humanity seem to be wiped away by the dust and debris of this post-apocalyptic landscape.  All that remains is a small group of sock puppet survivors who have set up a community in a cathedral.  Each has a number painted and/or embroidered into their body (which really helps us keep track in case we get confused).  Watching over this group is the oldest of the sock puppets (I really can’t believe I’ve been able to say “sock puppets” and keep a straight face) the oldest but maybe not the wisest… number 1.

But now I’m getting a little ahead of myself.  The film opens with the “birth” of 9 (voiced by Elijah Wood) who immediately ventures forth from his lab and meets up with 2, a similar being made of clockwork and cloth.  9 carries with him a strange object that 2 seems to recognize from somewhere.  Before he gets a chance to put 2 and 2 together (see what I did there?  I know… groan) they are attacked by a feral mechanical beast that takes not only 2 but also the object 9 had with him back to his lair.

Some time later, a broken down 9 is found and brought back to the cathedral I mentioned earlier.  He learns that there are many more little beings just like him.  After being repaired, 9 sets off along with 5 (voiced by John C. Reilly) to find 2 and bring him back home.  Unfortunately, the operation doesn’t go according to plan and the two end up awakening an evil created by mankind (and responsible for it’s destruction) that they must ALL come together to defeat.

For some reason, I couldn’t shake the feeling of The Secret of NIMH while I watched this film.  I’m not sure the movies have much more in common other than the protagonists are only a couple inches tall but the size and scope of buildings and characters in 9 definitely does play a key role.  Because of the limit of the size of the characters, you’ll find that majority of the action in this film takes place within the same three block area.  The continuity on this though is suspect at times.  There’s this ominous “evil lair” in the film that they always seem to show far off in the distance but apparently only takes a couple of seconds to get there from the cathedral.  It’s distracting if you notice it… but not a deal breaker.

The voice acting in this film is top notch.  Actors like Elijah Wood, Christopher Plummer and Jennifer Connelly team up with classic voice talents like Fred Tatasciore and Tom Kane to bring life to some fun and memorable characters.  Despite his recent track record of underwhelming film roles, John C. Reilly turns in an absolutely stellar voice performance here.

What can I say about the visuals?  You’ve seen the trailer.  It’s a gorgeous movie to look at.  It’s exhilarating, beautiful, ferocious and haunting.  With a 78 minute running time, you might find yourself wishing that the movie was just a little bit longer so you could sit there and continue to take in all of the pretty pretty. 

Extending the running time may have also helped the film properly hit those story beats.  All of the pieces of a classic fairy tale adventure are here… but the execution seems to cause quite a few premature emotional climaxes.  Let me try to illustrate it like this.  Imagine someone gives you a Valentine’s Day card.  The design on the cover is gorgeous.  It’s the kind of picture you’ve always dreamed of and sums up exactly what you feel.  Then you start to read it.  It’s the most touching and romantic thing you’ve ever read in your life.  The words are all perfect but then you get to the final line and it says something like “Yeah… I dig you so let’s make out or something.”  The payoff at the end just doesn’t live up to the journey you took to get there.

9 isn’t a bad movie.  In fact, it’s a pretty good one.  It just suffers from several of these emotional misfires through the course of the story.

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