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A well-written, well-scripted and wholly unconvincing Apocalypse.

The episode begins with Dean entering his hotel, but not before being asked by a man handing out pamphlets on the street if he’s given any thought to God. Dean brushes the guy off and enters his hotel, where he promptly gets a call from Castiel. Though struggling to hear Castiel on his cell phone, Dean gets a bit of good news – the Colt is still around. The demon-killing gun vanished with the ill-fated Bela in Season 3, but apparently the demons are still hanging on to it, Castiel hears. The angel urges Dean to meet with him, but Dean needs some sleep. Castiel reluctantly agrees and resigns himself to awkwardly waiting by the freeway for the next four hours.

Before Dean can get too much shut-eye he receives a call from Sam. His brother wants to go back into hunting together. He tells Dean about the news – he is Lucifer’s vessel. But Dean remains equally adamant about rejoining Sam. While he believes they should fight the Apocalypse, he thinks they should do it separately – and on separate hemispheres if possible. If they are together, the enemy will always try to use their bond against them – and he has five seasons of evidence to prove it.

Unfortunately, Dean is in for a rude awakening. He wakes upon a bare box spring, and wanders outside to find all of Kansas City a disaster area. Cars are overturned. Windows are shattered. The streets are deserted – and have been for some time. Venturing out, Dean is soon attacked by a glass-wielding girl. He sees the words “CROTOAN” spray-painted on the walls, and realizes the entire city has been consumed by the demonic plague. He also notes the dates on one of the signs – five years into the future. The infected are soon mowed down by the US Army, but Dean is nearly caught in the crossover. Slipping out in a hot-wired car, Dean finds himself in a little chat with Zacharias.

Dean knows what Zacharias is doing and wants to go back, but the angel is intent on Dean “marinating” a bit. After all, this whole future is a result of Dean refusing Michael. After Zacharias leaves, Dean goes to Bobby, but finds the entire place deserted. Bobby isn’t there, but the signs don’t bode well – his wheel chair is found empty, toppled over. He finds a picture of himself, Castiel and several other armed hunters posing in front of a place called Camp Citiqua. 

Dean finds Camp Citiqua, a fortified complex guarded by sentries and fences. In the grass, Dean sees something which breaks his heart – his Impala, broken, ruined and abandoned. While he mourns for the loss of his car, he is attacked from behind and promptly knocked out – by himself. When he comes to, Dean finds himself handcuffed to a wall, being confronted by his future self. Future Dean begrudgingly accepts Dean’s story, having performed prerequisite tests while he was out. He explains the Crotoan virus has spread throughout the world. Many have been lost, including Sam in a recent battle in Detroit. But he doesn’t want Dean out and about – because frankly Future Dean doesn’t trust himself.

Regardless, a determined Dean escapes and meets a still-neurotic Chuck, now the camp’s supply manager, and a jilted girlfriend, proving Dean’s bed-hopping habits haven’t changed. Dean also meets Castiel, now a perpetually-stoned New Age hippy engaging in plenty of orgies. His angelic powers have dulled. Future Dean returns from a mission, promptly shooting one of his men. His past self confronts him, shocking everyone under future Dean’s command.

The Future Dean explains the man was infected while on a mission, and would have started showing symptoms. Despite this reasoning, Dean remains more than a little unsettled by Future Dean’s callous attitude. He asks what the mission’s objective was, and his counterpart reveals it was the Colt – which he has successfully acquired. In a meeting with his staff, Future Dean reveals his plan – to kill Lucifer once and for all. Dean objects to his future self’s torturous methods, with Castiel pointing out he likes Dean’s past self better than the gloomy future one. Privately, Future Dean reveals to his younger self the reason he’s coming along – in order to see the face of the enemy, Sam. In Detroit, Future Dean explains Sam said “the big yes” to Lucifer.

En route, Castiel drops pill after pill. He confesses to Dean he is more or less completely mortal, and exhibits few if any of his powers. He even broke his foot at one point, which took two months to heal. Lost and helpless, he has surrendered himself to decadence and petty indulgence – the only things he can feel before the end of the world.

Future Dean and his team plan to storm Lucifer’s hideout, but something doesn’t feel right to Past Dean. He takes his counterpart aside, and Future Dean concurs that it’s a trap. The difference is that Future Dean knows it, and plans to sacrifice his friends – including Castiel – in order to kill Lucifer. Dean vehemently objects, preparing to tell his friends about his counterpart’s plans, but Future Dean punches him before he can proceed. When Dean wakes up, he watches helplessly as Future Dean’s neck is snapped – by Lucifer, in Sam’s body.

Lucifer apologizes for the bloodshed Dean has witnesses. He relates to Dean the story of his Fall – thrown down for not bowing to Man, when Lucifer was right about Man’s doomed nature all along. Dean doesn’t care about anything Lucifer says. He tells him he better kill him right now, because if he doesn’t, Dean will surely find a way to kill the Devil. But Lucifer disagrees. He says Dean won’t give in to Michael, and therefore everything else is meaningless. All roads lead to here, Lucifer explains softly. See you in five years, Dean.

Back in the present, Zacharias is anxious for Dean’s thoughts, now that he has seen the coming Apocalypse. Having seen all that, Zacharias knows there’s only one thing to do – give Michael permission and become his vassal. Dean’s expression softens. He walks by Zacharias, mournfully turns around and then quietly replies, “Nah.” Angered, Zacharias vows to torture Dean until he agrees, but he’s gone before Zacharias can do anything. Dean finds himself standing next to Castiel on the road. They had an appointment, Castiel tells him. Dean tells Castiel never to change. He also tells Castiel he has to do something he should have done a long time ago.

On the road the next morning, Dean meets Sam. He hands Sam his knife, explaining Sam’s going to need it. He’s probably rusty, being the second-best hunter in the world and all. Dean apologizes for not trusting Sam, and for pushing him away. Though he knows their enemies will use their bond against them, he also knows they are stronger together than apart. When Sam asks what they do next, Dean replies they make their own future.

This episode features great acting, well-balanced direction and a script from Ben Edlund (The Tick, Angel), but none of this can save a bad premise. The infected I remember from “Croatoan” were more “Body Snatchers” than “28 Days Later.” They are, after all, possessed by demons – not zombies. Though we don’t really see a lot of the infected in this episode, they seem quite a bit different from the ones in “Croatoan.” In fact, I’m not quite sure what symptoms Future Dean is talking about. Though homicidal, the Infected of “Croatoan” remained rational, seemingly normal people who could talk like normal, set up road blocks and even blend in. Those few we see in “The End” are generally mute, ragged-looking individuals who murderously chase anyone they see. Clearly, Lucifer would have a great deal more success with the subtle “Croatoans” rather than the easily identified Infected of “The End.”

Honestly, I expected this all to be a Zacharias-fueled hallucination – a kind of post-apocalyptic PSA designed to get Dean to sign up with Michael. While this is briefly mentioned, it’s not heavily pursued, though it’s clear we can only trust this future as much as we trust Zacharias. Still, certain elements – such as the Colt as well as Lucifer’s subdued manner – seem more consistent with a full-fledged future instead of an angelic pep talk.

Despite the plot hole, the episode did have plenty of high points. Jensen Ackles does extremely well distinguishing himself as the hardened Future Dean and his considerably brighter counterpart. Misha Collins succeeds in both furthering Castiel’s awkward adjustment to rogue angel, and opening up a new front in the angel’s decadent future. Even Jared Padalecki does a good job stepping into the daunting shoes of Lucifer himself, playing the fallen angel with soft-spoken nuance. 

But as convincing as the actors are and as convincing as the script is, I just don’t buy it. It’s a good linking episode which successfully gets Sam and Dean back together, and it’s a enjoyable episode with some good moments here and there, but little else. But hopefully, the Winchesters will have better luck next episode – facing off with Paris Hilton, Abraham Lincoln and Gandhi. 

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