PopSyndicate.com

A-Kon. It brings to mind things like cosplay, LARPS, body odor, and other such geekery. Over seventeen thousand crazed fans of manga and anime ruling a hotel for three days, wearing illogical and architecturally unsound costumes, and screaming at each other over which version of Gundam is best. People would have to be completely insane to submit themselves to such a massive rush of bodies, sweat, tulle and Styrofoam swords – not to mention price gouging and three days of eating nothing but Pocky.

Luckily, I am completely insane.

In Dallas, A-Kon is a time-honored tradition. Thanks to such novelties as Funimation’s close quarters, we draw in massive crowds for A-Kon, and in this, its nineteenth year, the spectacle was especially spectacle-esque. Over the course of three days I saw a Borg who actually expelled steam (steampunkers beware, you’re being outdone by a trekker), a hentai tentacle monster (and his witting victim), a Japanese metal band in frilly costumes (and laws, their guitarists did thrash) and watched a horromedy of brilliant proportions.

I was pelted in the boobies by a larper throwing his fire attack, leered at by Tony Stark (lesson: there’s probably a reason why he chose to dress as Tony Stark, so ladies, keep your cleavage safe), taught how to pick up chicks by animator Steve Bennett and befriended by Bizenghast creator M. Alice LeGrow (little did she know I would proceed to follow her around all weekend). 

Friday morning started early. By nine a.m., there was already a good crowd of people in costumes, ready and willing to be photographed (and photograph I did – I came home with over two hundred and fifty photos). The booths were set up, the dealer room was open, and the smell of cash was already in the air (and sweat, despite Foamy the Squirrel’s pleading on the A-Kon website). Excitement was everywhere. By noon, the hotel had been overrun, and the escalators had broken down.

The first major event on my schedule was Peter S. Beagle’s presentation on The Last Unicorn. While waiting for Mr. Beagle to arrive, a mouthy woman in a ball gown showed up – one M. Alice LeGrow (in Sarah’s gown from Labyrinth). I instantly identified her and – lucky me – she plonked down (as well as a person in a ball gown can plonk) in the chair next to mine. We chatted; I bribed her with a prezzie and she gave me candy.  It was the best of first contacts, and from it, a fancrush was born.

I felt like a rock star with her sitting next to me, chatting conspiratorially while we waited for Peter S. Beagle to show up. I had so much fun talking to her, in fact, that it took me a while to notice that Mr. Beagle had not yet shown up. Ten minutes passed, then fifteen. Kon staffers frantically tried to hunt him down, while plying us with the bonus features on The Last Unicorn DVD. Eventually he arrived half an hour late, but we listened to him in hushed admiration anyway. He’s Peter S. freakin’ Beagle!

There were several panels over the weekend, most of them with similar titles that merely provided fans an excuse to grill the talent on subjects far and wide. Most of the panels I attended had M. Alice in them, and for good reason – she’s a walking factory of brilliantly witty and amoral comments. No matter where she showed up or what topic she was supposed to cover, a wide array of randomness was discussed. Among my favorite topics were: hookers and blow, an imaginary comic company called Baby Rapers International, cake (being extracted from her hair, hiding in the room, being fought over by panel members, hiding under her crown, etc), her shiny new bicycle, her costumes (on Saturday she dressed in a spectacular Alice in Wonderland\Queen of Hearts Lolita outfit), and her adventures in her own brain. She did dish out a good deal of practical industry related advice, which made her a double threat to the other panelists.

Among the other panelists who impressed were Paul Benjamin (writer for Tokyopop’s Pantheon High and Marvel’s Marvel Adventures Hulk) and Steve Bennett. I saw both with M. Alice and independently. Paul Benjamin, who is himself quick-witted and very funny, proved to be an excellent guy to chat with no matter where he was or what he was doing. I picked up Pantheon High after meeting him, and enjoyed it quite a bit. He has fantastic ideas, and was quite the gentleman to boot – he rescued my Hello Kitty fan after I lost it – I even inadvertently gave him a character idea (I expect royalties, Mr. Benjamin).

My first encounter with Steve Bennett was in a panel called “How to Talk To Girls”, which I went to on a lark while waiting for Versailles on Friday night. It was an 18+ only panel, and given to a packed room (which amazed me). There were several who had the same shenanigan agenda as me, but Mr. Bennett conducted the panel well, and had a laid-back, humorous approach. I saw him again on a panel Saturday (one that was more comic oriented), and once more, I respected his speaking style.

The kon’s main events were wild. Versailles, a Japanese metal band, performed on Friday night. They were elaborately costumed from head to toe – the kind of dress that can get a man lynched in the south – yet still cranked out some intense, guitar heavy metal to a screaming, chanting, fists-in-the-air mob. One of the kon’s aims was to break the Guinness record for most video game cosplayers in one room. As the previous record was 80, it was broken by more than five hundred people. Mischief managed.

On Saturday, a horromedy called Red Victoria aired in the main viewing room. Red Victoria is about a horror film writer stuck in a rut of mediocrity. He is visited by a muse in the guise of a hot zombie chick, and in trying to inspire him, she kills his friends, his associates, his pool guy, and random passers-by. The crowd was wild for the film, cheering and clapping, laughing all the way (though in the intense final moments, you could have heard a pin drop for all the breath holding). Its a bizarrely funny film, wholly recommended to anyone who has a chance to see it.

And of course, there were costumes. Final Fantasy was a big winner this year, especially considering all the Kingdom Hearts peoples. Splinter Cell agents Bob and Steve of G4’s popular cartoon rocked, and a visit from Pucca and Garu drew a huge crowd. Silent Hill, Jet (with Ein) and Spike from Cowboy Beebop, Princess Mononoke – all excellently done, not to mention whole casts of One Piece, Tsubasa, and Naruto. It was a full display of pageantry, and from furries to pirates, most every fan genre was represented. The devotion shown by the fans constantly amazed me with their quality and panache.

Gaming of every kind went on all day and night without end – LARPing and Robotech and Warcraft, oh my! The dealer room overflowed with masses of fantastic weapons, manga, clothing, anime, statues, plush toys – you name it. I spent two days on an elaborate hunt for the perfect cat ears, and found them, managing to snag a bargain in the process.

Sunday was a day of mad bargains and brunching with the talent. I managed to stalk M. Alice even there, scoring a seat next to her at brunch. The food was bland, but who cared? I had been reunited with my new hero (who, incidentally, signed multiple copies of Bizenghast for me – even giving me the badge of minion in one). Voice actor Vic Mignogna wowed the crowd, and because of the very limited seating, I was able to mingle with him, not to mention all of the big name guests, such as the hugely popular Shinichi Watanabe (who himself was cosplayed by many attendees).

Despite escalators that were actually stairs, smoke bombs and fake poo in the elevators, hour long lines for said elevators, insanely high prices for food, crazy, sleep-deprived, drug-addled or socially impotent fans, the event was a blast - one that makes me yearn for next year, so I can do it all again.

4